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Saturday, July 18, 2009 at 2:56 AM

As usual, I am alone in the house right now. The rest of the family members are eating out with sis`s boyfriend. They asked me to tag along but I am just too lazy. I often spend my weekends alone as the other family members will surely have some plans by going out to somewhere in Singapore but I am loyal to this house. I guess I can be the security guard. -_-
I`ve been coming home late for the past 3-4 days. Why? I need to complete my F&N coursework. And it was all done yesterday! Finally. Alhamdullilah.
N-Level and Prelim are drawing nearer and I have yet to do my revision. Lazy much? Yeap... Do not blame me. Blame on my mood. I just don`t have the mood to do my revision right now. Especially Maths! Whatever...I`ll try to force myself.
Gonna watch APM later! Bobo.. remember to watch your Hujan. Hehe!

Speechless From Michael Jackson

Your love is magical, that's how I feel
But I have not the words here to explain
Gone is the grace for expressions of passion
But there are worlds and worlds of ways to explain
To tell you how I feel
But I am speechless, speechless
That's how you make me feel
Though I'm with you I am far away and nothing is for real
When I'm with you I am lost for words, I don't know what to say
My head's spinning like a carousel, so silently I pray
Helpless and hopeless, that's how I feel inside
Nothing's real, but all is possible if God is on my side
When I'm with you I am in the light where I cannot be found
It's as though I am standing in the place called Hallowed Ground
Speechless, speechless, that's how you make me feel
Though I'm with you I am far away and nothing is for real
I'll go anywhere and do anything just to touch your face
There's no mountain high I cannot climb
I'm humbled in your grace
Speechless, speechless, that's how you make me feel
Though I'm with you I am lost for words and nothing is for real
Speechless, speechless, that's how you make me feel
Though I'm with you I am far away, and nothing is for real
Speechless, speechless, that's how you make me feel
Though I'm with you I am lost for words and nothing is for real
SpeechlessYour love is magical, that's how I feel
But in your presence I am lost for words
Words like, "I love you."


Hopefully God Will Listen To My Prayers.
And Yes, It Is Too Painful And Hurtful.
I Know That God Will Protect You.
And God Will Protect Us.

Missing Somone That Does Not Exist In This World Anymore.

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My dreams will blossom...


Saturday, July 11, 2009 at 5:32 AM

I can`t believe that I am still feeling down and will break down easily every night. I know it sounds crazy but I don`t even understand why I should break down silently. I watched the M.J Memorial Service few days ago and I broke down again when his daughter made the surprise speech. Luckily I was in my room all alone. I can bet you that if I watched with my mum, she would say that I am crazy for crying over such a small matter and it does not related to me whatsoever. Furthurmore, I do not want to cry in front of my Mom. I would make such a fool of myself. My sis and I slept around 1+ am yesterday just for the sake of watching M.J videos. Funny! You will smile and laugh when you watch his private home videos. Seriously. It shows the real side of him.

Had MT Oral last Thursday. I could not keep myslef calm. I just wanted to run away from the hall. I had no idea that there would be 2 invigilators. When I got to know it from Nabilah and Nisa, I wanted to kill myself. Imagine this, you need to have a conversation with 2 people in front of you,watching and staring at you all the way. Uncomfortable much? Hell yeah. The topic was about why and how teenagers get angry. Alhamdullilah, it was okay but I think I did it quite badly. Oh well.. it was over anyway. Coming up next, English Oral this coming Tuesday and I can predict my result. I am going to be seriously dead.

I am all alone in the house right now. The parents are out somewhere in Singapore while the elder Sis and her boyfriend are out to somewhere in Singapore. So there`s only me in the house. I don`t mind living alone as I can have my free time doing anything I like. Watcing Tv, eating, surfing the net, reading, dreaming and imagining things. I am a dreamer and when I am imagining sweet things, I will smile to myself. I can go to such an extent sometime.

Okay then, I think this post is getting nonsensical. I will stop here. Till whenever.

And when I look up to the sky, I wonder if you can see how hurt I am down here.
I don`t care about Love right now as I am thinking about Life.

My dreams will blossom...


Sunday, July 5, 2009 at 10:04 PM

I do realise that life is only for temporary but I do not realise that when we are enjoying ourselves, we will tend to forget how short our lives will be. Devils are all around us and as humans, we are not perfect in every angle. We do not know when we will die. Hence we need to enjoy life to the fullest. On the other hand, if we enjoy life to the fullest, we tend to forget that we are over-enjoying life. And I think that is the most complicated thing in life. We need to enjoy life but there is a limit.

People always remember someone when that someone has gone. I wonder why because I am one of them. I will miss someone more when they are gone. When they are not in this world anymore. I happened to watch M.J Videos and there are thousands and millions of them who said they miss him even more and they would like M.J to be alive again although it is impossible. And again, I am one of them too. I happened to read a comment from someone that said she will cry everynight when she listens to his songs. I don`t wanna tell you if I cry too. Go and figure it out.

It has been 12 days since M.J`s tragic death and I am still wondering what his actual religion is. Is he really a Muslim? Whatever it is, I really hope he is a Muslim. May Allah Bless Him And Forgive All His Sins. I hope he is leading a good life there.

When I re-read this, I am scared. I am scared of death. It comes without warning.

I do not want to change the song for the time being. It`s my current favourite song although I know that it was released when I was around 2 years old.

My dreams will blossom...